The primary protagonist of Cheer Up, Emo Kid. Zeke used to have a fairy-tale view of life and love and relationships, until his fairy-tale princess left him for another frog. The breakup has left him in a state of emotional disarray, where one minute, he’s proclaiming his undying love for her, and the next, he’s declaring a hatred for her so fierce that it burns straight through the seven hells and creates an eighth, more hellish, hell.

In contrast to Zeke, Frank has a much more cynical perspective of the world, and strives constantly to shift Zeke’s (and everyone else’s) beliefs to something closer — ideally, identical — to his own. When he is not out boozing or whoring, he sits at his roadside booth, dispensing to the world (and anybody who will listen) harsh truths and tough love like some kind of lemonade stand for masochists.